Uncle Dan’s Notes: Asian Americans and TCKs
I’m going to the reference of my own experience in this post, namely being a TCK, and being (technically) an Asian-American. Hopefully it can relate to some of your experiences.
I never thought that much about being Asian American. It had occurred to me that people didn’t take me that seriously as an American growing up, because I looked Asian, but then most of my friends weren’t exactly what they said they were either. Lots of Eurasians, who had a strange, mixed loyalty to both their birth nationalities/races. And it was perfectly fine to us, so I fit in that category, in a way.
Coming to the US was an education in itself, for all the reasons I think American TCKs are familiar with. Race is a big thing in the US, for good and ill. It’s so recognized that people define themselves by it. This holds true for Asian Americans.
Second, third and later generations of Asians in the US stick together out of a shared sense of confusion about what they should be. Older, more traditional family members, do all those lovely Asian things to the younger ones: inputting values of family loyalty, career security, and ALWAYS, some kind of musical instrument.
At the same time, they get institutionalized by the world outside, which is American culture. Independence, self-achievement and freedom of opinion are things which tend to clash. As such, Asian Americans tend to have a lot in common. They can, and sometimes do, stick together because they feel that the others know what they’re going through.
I took a class when I was in Michigan, which was probably my most interesting class ever. “Chinese Culture as portrayed through American Film.” It was fascinating. I was learning about a whole new world of the way Asians were portrayed in popular culture in the US for the last century. From Fu Manchu to Bruce Lee to Lucy Liu. Something about the portrayal was never right, but always slotted neatly into the minds of “normal” Americans. It leads to the “Lotus Blossom” idea of the purty and simplicity of Asian women, which is misleading. Not to mention the whole Femme Fatale thing of the 20’s movies, and Lucy Liu’s whole Dominatrix-Charlie’s-Angels thing.
It’s amazing Asians haven’t rebelled in the US considering all the blatant racism in the younger years, and the more subtle kinds you might still see, but that too, is part of the difference between older and younger generations.
It more or less splits into two groups. The whole thing is based on the idea of the “ideal citizen” which traditional Asians are seen to be: hardworking, unquestioning, and usually no trouble.
One side argues that this is bad, because while African-Americans and Hispanic-Americans were marching for Civil Rights in the 1960s, Asian-Americans were keeping their heads down and making no trouble: doing your laundry, washing your dishes, and smiling over a pot of rice. They think that the example of William Hung (the Asian guy who sung terribly in American Idol to earn millions of dollars for his good attitude) was disgusting, and showed that they still weren’t taken seriously.
The other side argues that they don’t get in trouble (they’re never pointed at when things go wrong the way that African-Americans and Hispanics are), and that all in all it’s not a bad thing to be model citizens. We’re happy and get on with our lives, right?
And the first side argues again that that is just being SO Asian, and accepting of the inequality that Asians get.
I remember that in this class I was encouraged to pick a side, because the young professor teaching it was interested in what we thought about it. Or at least having an opinion. And naturally, you can imagine that I really couldn’t. Up until that moment it wasn’t my battle.
How can you explain to someone that for all your life, none of that mattered? I had never even thought about it. I couldn’t come up with a good answer. NOW I can, but it’s been a long while.
The funny thing is that there were people who thought it WAS my battle. Because I am, technically, a second generation Asian-American. I just didn’t live in the US. So I was offered by the Asian fraternities to join them in their brotherhood of Asians which felt so, so weird. So naturally I didn’t join them.
Most Asian-Americans I meet these days are very Americanized. It’s not something I relate to. Interestingly though, one of the friends I made in Michigan was a Korean who had only spent his high-school years in the US, and as such was very in-between. In hindsight, I think he was influenced by so many people to call himself Asian-American, but at heart still felt different. I think that people wanted to call him Asian-American, because that’s what Asians WERE to most Americans. They were either that, or under the lovely umbrella term of “FOB”.
Which is sad, because one thing that seems consistent with a lot of Asian-Americans is that sense of rebellion, of saying “We Are Not Our Parents!” You shouldn’t really rebel based on what you’re not, but what you are. And Asian-Americans are far from figuring out what they are.
In this, I think TCKs face a similar issue. I think that instead of declaring what we’re not, we should be trying to discover just what it is that we are. Rebelling for the simple satisfaction it brings isn’t the answer. Just having the term “TCK” makes it a lot easier, but it’s a start and a stepping stone.
Let’s think outside the box.
May 27th, 2008 at 3:22 am
This is a good topic so I’m going to bump it up. Unfortunately I don’t have the time to put my thoughts together and write much because my boyfriend’s mom’s arriving later on today and there’s much to be done.
But let me say that:
TCKs are by products of globalization. They are the silent and ignored minority group that go through the world invisibly.
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May 27th, 2008 at 5:43 am
Very interesting Dan!
I’ll have to come back to it as i have to go to sleep now (it’s almost midnight and i have an early class tomorrow).
So i’m just bumpin’ it.
Remind me to tell you abt the time when my uni French teacher lectured me abt losing my language and culture.
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May 27th, 2008 at 7:02 am
I actually have a thing against the word ‘Asians’.
Purely because it’s too stereotypical. I’ve made friends with a lot of races: Malays, Chinese, Blacks/Coloureds, Whites, etc the lost goes on. Unfortunately, most people see Asians has, like you say, a very obedient intelligent sort of race, and true enough, that was what I got mistaken for in South Africa. I distinctly remember having to play softball the one time, and the girls, having never played the sport before, weren’t so keen to go up and volunteer, and one of them remarked that the ’smart people’ should have the first go, upon which the entire grade turned around to look at me and asked me to give it a shot. And I was never really one of those super-intelligent people. I did alright in my studies, if I studied more, the way they emphasise in countries like China, I MIGHT get better grades, but generally, I wasn’t the smartest. There were others with a lot more brains than I had, but everyone automatically assumed I was bright because I was Chinese.
In addition to this, the label of ‘Asian’ in today’s world applies spectacularly to the Chinese/Japanese/Koreans. Which annoys me to no end, because the last time I checked, Asia was the biggest and most diverse continent in the world, not that little section on the map known as the ‘oriental lands’.
Ever since, I’ve rejected tha notion of an ‘Asian’ because it stereotypes too much. I’ve unintentionally started my own mini-campaign in school because everyone insists on stereotyping me as ‘Asian’. People who don’t know me very well even believe that I hang out with the ‘Asian’ group, when actually, the races of the people I hang out with are very diverse.
You make some good points about Asian Americans being rather confused, and I suppose in a world like this, people just have to find a way to stereotype. For me, stereotype has no meaning, nor does it have any influence in my world. It’s a force that I challenge and fight against everyday. But I guess after all this travelling, stereotypes just have no place with me.
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May 27th, 2008 at 7:05 am
Also- what is a ‘FOB’? LOL, sorry, but I heard the term before in school, just that I was too afraid to ask. I get that it’s got something to do with the Asian rejects…or something similar to it.
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May 27th, 2008 at 7:19 am
“FOB” means Fresh Off the Boat. In my experience, Asian-Americans use it more than other Americans, and it ends up being kind of derogatory. I don’t like it either.
And you’re right mish. I actually got the same sort of rep in my school, relatively international as it was. From the beginning I was a bespectacled, quiet Asian kid with funny hair. You couldn’t have TRIED to make me look more nerdy up until I was about 13. So all the kids thought I was smart because I was Asian and had glasses on.
In a way you can’t blame them, since almost all childhood literature paints a clever person to wear glasses. Funny thing was that, regardless of how smart I might have naturally been, I think I just started to live up to the expectations.
The thing about the term “Asian” is that in the US, it means the “oriental” peoples: Chinese, Japanese, Korean, Vietnamese. In the UK, it means India/Pakistan. It’s all relative. So in this case, I do mean Eastern Asians within the context of the US.
Most of South East Asia is little represented in the US. Partially because some of them (Vietnamese and Thai, as well as the Chinese populations of Malaysia and Indonesia) get lumped with the “Asian” group. Malay people (darker skinned Malaysians, Indonesians, Thais and so on) also don’t often get the opportunity to travel over there, and I don’t think are prevalent enough to make their own mark.
There are still people who call Asians “Orientals” which is to me, wrong. “Asian” is definitely the lesser evil, and not a terrible thing. I know lots of Asians who call all white people “European” so I think that’s just the way of the world.
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May 27th, 2008 at 7:41 am
…which reminds what this American guy of ME origin said to me when I was in London:
You all look the same. A lot of Americans can’t tell the difference between a Filipino and a Chinese :p
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May 27th, 2008 at 7:01 pm
Uncle Dan,
It’s a good topic to discuss. I have lived in a dorm room with one Mandarin-American and one Cantonese-American Chinese girls for a year. I have watched them studying Asian American Studies, have taken courses and attended Asian-Pacific seminars/conferences with them, and participated in many of their Asian-oriented activities led by them in student organizations.
In my observations, Asian-Americans attempt to thrive their identity by taking pride in the Asian celebrities that cut through the racism in the U.S. and made it to the media. I constantly came across trivia games that place one’s knowledge in famous Asian Americans (Chinese, Japanese, Korean, etc.) regardless of what their race were as though they all tie into this one group called “Asian-American.”
There were the mentioning of names of Kungfu stars, world famous building constructors/designers, etc.
I had to constantly ask myself, “Why bother to increase the awareness of Asianness(?) in the U.S.?”
I was made uncomfortable by my friends’ (including my roommates’) placement of such importance in what other Asians have done in the past. Why should these define them? And why should this define even me??
As a Korean, I am constantly seen and referred to as Asian-American. Depending on the people, I have to call myself back and forth between F.O.B. and Twinky (derogatory term for Asian-Americans but not derogatory when one is Twinky oneself) because I am always asked that question whether i am one!!! and then it leads to “Since when have you lived in the States?” Yukk >_< What more, worse question is "When were you born?"
I have to tell you. I am not judging anyone and I ask these questions to others myself! so maybe I am a hypocrite in that sense LOL but then i can't help it because it seems like this is the best way to relate to other Asian-Americans. >_< But you know what. I learned something important from these Asian-American friends of mine. Because of their effort to define themselves and to cry out their rights (yes, I have seen human activists who are thriving to make their rights known in the U.S.), an Asian like me who has a different mindset from them can take for granted the work and impact made to uproot the racism and stereotypes inhumanly made. (Racism and stereotypes may never be gone but we can hope better, right?)
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May 27th, 2008 at 7:12 pm
… I’m not american or whatever, but being an immigrant in canada, i think i go close enough. Although if any loyal canadian saw me saying that canadians are close to being american, i’d probably get shot, haha. I mean, they’re not the same.. But yenno..
Anyways, to get to the point.. I remember this one time, a girl in my gym class laughed at me and a friend, let’s call her jessica (who was of polish and russian descent but grew up here) because our hair style looked almost the same, only she was blond and i had black hair. So i go, ‘well, yenno, i’m jessica’s twin, only she’s white and i’m asian’ and jessica, the girl with the hair like mine, goes, ‘hang on, i thought you were filipino?’
I stared at her for maybe 3 seconds and blinked.. And i think i said something like, ‘uh, the philippines is in asia, so yeah, i’m asian, jessica,’ and i laughed dryly.
She lets out a long ‘ohhh’ followed by a high pitched ‘really?’ and hence i nodded.
But looking back now, i wonder what i am, like, race-wise. Sure, i was born and lived in the phils for 8 years, moved to the uae.. Both, technically, asian, but very (i cannot emphasise this enough) different culture-wise. I mean, i say i’m filipino, yeah, but at the same time, i’ve always struggled about trying to identify with the whole filipino culture even before i became a ‘TCK’. My dad would come back from his travels (and for some reason, he only really did this to me and not to my sisters) and he’d take out my own children’s atlas (i still have it haha) and he’d show me where he went and where he’s going next. I guess i was made to be a TCK.. I dunno. But really, i never was fully filipino. Not saying i don’t wanna be. I sometimes wish i was.. Cause maybe i’d get along better with other filipinos better. But then i can’t really say i’m arab. Cause, well, first i don’t look like one, and although i can read and write in arabic, i don’t speak the language as fluent as i would want.. And now, in canada.. Well, can’t say i’m canadian, even after getting our citizenship papers done. I have the whole canadian accent down (even the ‘about’ that sounds like ‘a-boot’, that uncle dan and sim like to make fun of me for) and i almost have that passport and the papers.. And the national anthem, in english AND french. But i still can’t say i’m asian canadian. Or just asian. Or filipino. Or arab. Or whatever. I’d have to pause when i’m asked what i really am, as a part of a race. And i would always come up with a different answer. All the frgn time, a different one.
Maybe i should just make one up. Like kristineian. Or kristine-ese. Or kristine-ish. I think i’m cool enough to have my own category.
Like uncle said, the term ‘TCK’ is only a stepping stone.
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May 27th, 2008 at 9:35 pm
So the Asians in America aren’t blamed for things that go badly over there? Who do the WASPs take out their anger on?
In Australia its the “Asians” and the Muslims who get the rap. The Asians here are seen as very smart and hardworking with very strict parents who while they may go through periods of dating whites or others will marry other Asians.
And the Muslims? They’re all a bunch of terrorists and their kids are seen as the next suicide bombers. It’s disgusting what people think.
Just last night in Camden a suburb in Sydney’s lower west unanimously voted against creating an Islamic school for thinly veiled “land restrictions”.
But i digress.
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May 28th, 2008 at 12:05 am
Ohhh Muslims don’t get by that well in the US either. It used to be okay, but since the whole 9/11 thing it hasn’t been terrific.
This article shows that even in New York, which holds itself to be different and multicultural, there’s a LOT of anti-Muslim feeling:
http://www.nytimes.com/2008/04/28/nyregion/28school.html?_r=1&oref=slogin
And yeah, I know that Asians get a bad rep in Australia. But the US generally considers its Afro-Americans and Hispanics to be more troublesome.
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