The Fetal Diaries #45: I give up. | TCKID 2.0

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The Fetal Diaries #45: I give up.

Maybe it’s just me being naive, but my first assumption about non-TCKs that never moved out of their birthtown is that they probably never made it outside Canada. Of course, that is untrue. I have a handful of non-TCK acquaintances/friends (that still have the same address they used back in kindergarten) that go on vacations outside the country more than my family could. I can’t count how many Fort Mc kids I knew were in Europe, Central America, and even Asia last summer. I will give you, the reader, a moment to pause and think about the million reasons as to why this is unfair… *moment of silence*

See, I see no problems with them getting out and interacting with the rest of the world. I say go and do that for the rest of your life – it’s a good thing. I mean, that’s how I was brought up, and I see no wrong in that.

The thing is, most of the said acquaintances and/or friends that go out of the country for vacations go for a tan, new clothes, and “a break from it all”. You’d think they’d come back with all that AND new or improved perspectives on the rest of the world, but noooo, that’s not the case. Nuh uh. It’s almost a given that they will come back with foreign words that they almost always manage to mangle pronounciation wise, but never a new perspective on the global community.

If it weren’t for the reprecussions (a.k.a. my bank account done broke), I’d have brought plane tickets to Thailand for my whole Math 20 Pure class. Math class, because I think my Advanced English 20-1 and Physics 20 classmates are a relatively intelligent bunch. That would be fun. Just the look on their faces when they experience major culture shock.. I can see it now.. However, I don’t think I have money in the safe to start with anyways, so that that brilliant idea is out the window.

However, the math kids still need some global education. First, the insensitive racial comments that I hear everyday is simply outrageous. I barely ever make a big deal out of it, but lately, it seems like my classmates have been on a racist-comment-saying mode. If someone sent these kids to some country with a proud peoples, I don’t think they’d make it out alive.

* * *

Two days ago, I was at a party. I was the only TCK, non-Caucasian girl there. Now I love these people I chilled at the party with. They’re a cool, smart, polite bunch of kids, and they know how to throw a decent party. But there was one particular thing one of the girls said that threw me off. One, because it was totally naive (for lack of a better word) and she’s a smart girl. But two, I kinda expected to hear that from one of them sooner or later during the night. I know, contradicting, but that is what I thought. Anyways, this is what she said: “You’re Filipino, Kristine?? I thought you were Japanese Korean!” Now let’s pause again.. LEARN YOUR DIFFERENT ASIANS WOMAN! I would get it if she said I looked Thai or Indonesian. That sort of makes sense. But I am far from Japanese or Korean. I can’t even say I speak Japanese yet, since my very first Japanese test today showed that I fail at it (but I will not back down). And my Korean is limited to: “Do you wanna die?” “No,” “Yes,” and “I love you”. One thing I need to teach my classmates: learn the different kinds of Asians, because there’s something wrong when Japanese are supposed to look Filipino and vice versa.

Oh, and as I write this, I’m on MSN chatting, and I just asked one of my classmates if I looked Japanese or Korean. He said that yes, I do. That it. I give up.

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Posted by kristine at 8:42 pm on November 24th, 2008. Comments
Categories: Blog.

  • mairabay
    (very late comment, but...)

    Oh, Fetus! I'm sorry you had to go through that!

    For the record, though, I'm not very good at diferentiating asian people either. I can diferentiate Japanese from Chinese and that's about it. I grew up in Europe (back when there were almost NO immigrants) and the south of Brazil (composed of 90% descendents of european immigrants - ie "white"), so I have had very little contact with asian people. It's just not enough experience for me to be able to tell if sb is Korean or not, you know? I do admit it's plain ignorance.
    [ignorance is not knowing something because you were never taught it. dumbness is not knowing something EVEN THOUGH you were taught it]
    so anyway, I admit my ignorance. =D

    Maybe your colleagues are like me (ie have had little contact with asian people to be able to tell the difference) or they are just plain stupid. Considering Canada is such a diverse country, I'm tempted to think it's the latter.

    Nonetheless I would NEVER, EVER say "I thought you were Korean" if I can't even tell what that is!
    OR I would say that, BUT follow with an excuse "but I'm not very good at telling these different ethinicities appart, I've never had much contact with them, sorry".
    AND, even more important, I would add "you are a great friend and I don't even care if you looke Japanese, Korean, or whatever. I doesn't make any difference to me. You're Kristine and that's what matters" ;)

    Also, I bet that a Japanese teen who has never left his small town in Japan can't differentiate a German from an Italian. It's just how people are, and the contact they have with other ethinicites.

    But I know how you feel, it's terrible when you realise that the people around you DON'T HAVE A CLUE about who you are!
  • Ayako
    ElizabethD: It must have something to do with the fact that they used to cast Italians to play Asians in Hollywood movies and people were perfectly fine with that! ;)
  • ElizabethD
    My friend is Mexican and she is frequently mistaken for someone from any asian country imaginable. I think she looks like she is from Mexico, I don't get it.
  • Ayako
    Brice: LOL...@ the general rule of thumb.
  • Aw.. Kristine, it must be frustrating to be around a smart bunch of classmates and schoolmates(?) and they are ignorant of other ethnicities and cultural perceptions.

    I just read an article yesterday about raising a female global leader. One of the main qualities of becoming a global leader, according to the article, is not just the ability to speak another language fluently but to have open-mindedness towards cultural difference without bias. That it is not the language but this open-mindedness is what makes a global leader.

    We all as TCKs are familiar with this don't we? Learning Japanese may not come easy (I've lived in Japan but I still find learning Japanese challenging!) but you know what? Kristine, you already have the quality to become a leader that can embrace the world.

    I am looking forward to your future :)
  • Brice
    Heeey sis, you're not alone. I've gotten Filipino once. (I don't look like it at all!). I've gotten some racial comments too when I was in high-school.

    Nowadays, I just laugh about it, and make them guess again. I'm multiracial so I never expect people to guess right.

    Maybe we should write a post for Non-TCKs on questions they can ask if they aren't sure where we're from.

    I suppose the general rule of thumb would be:

    1. Don't assume anything! Wearing a poncho doesn't make someone Mexican. :P

    2. Follow rule #1.
  • Ayako
    eeeek

    You know what Kristine?

    When my family was in Mexico they asked us if we were from the Philippines.

    And we thought: How did they know we've been living there for more than a decade?

    But I don't think it had anything to do with them being insightful....it was just an ignorant comment like the person who thought you were Japanese or Korean.

    And then it got worse.

    I wore a Mexican poncho I purchased in Mexico to school and one Iranian boy asked me: Are you Mexican? <----Since when does one become Mexican just because they're wearing a poncho?

    And the other Iranian boy who was with him said: Look at her eyes, stupid! She's not Mexican.

    LOL?
  • Uncle Dan
    It's a sad reality that often they probably won't get much better. Perfectly capable and good individuals, but possibly no less ignorant. And they don't have to be, to get on with their lives.

    Of course, they're still young too, so anything could happen in five years. Just don't expect it, would be my advice.
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