The Fetal Diaries #31: Naivety vs. Ignorance
Warning: Upsetting situations concerning racism.
I usually don’t like thinking of anyone as ignorant. I prefer to use the term naive, and that’s what i’d been thinking of my coworkers for the past year.
The place i work at, a bakery, has a very diverse group of people. There are a lot of filipina women (mainly ones that only work on weekends to pass time and make money on the side), a venezuelan, korean, mexican, sri lankan, indian, chinese, ethiopian and maybe 4 whites/canadians. Now, i liked the fact that i get to work in an environment like this. Being a TCK, i was more comfortable with more diverse groups of people. I thought that maybe if i worked there, i could get the chance to learn more about their cultures and such, which would be cool. What i didn’t know was that there was more to that.
Now, the white people (for lack of a better term, so pardon me if i offend anyone) that i mentioned earlier, all of them grew up in predominantly white towns. As a matter of fact, for one of them, moving into this town was her first big move, and the diversity of the place excited her. Her hometown barely had any other kinds of people… I, on the other hand, found this city barely diverse. Coming from calgary, i know how diverse really is. Anyways, she was excited. I first met her about a year ago and we got along alright. As time passed by, i started to notice her habit of making careless ‘jokes’ and comments about other races. Actually, 3 out of 4 of the white people did so. At first, i tried to ignore it; maybe it was a harmless joke and i shouldn’t bother myself, right? I mean, they did grow up in predominantly white towns.. Maybe the diversity of the place will grow on them. It’s only naivety, and they can’t help it. All i gotta do is temporarily ground myself into their situation and try to understand, until they learn. Well, it kept on and i resorted to trying to talk more about what i’ve experienced. Like explaining why this certain woman covered her face up… I thought it worked for a while.. Then i started to hear things from the filipinas about how those white girls have been telling the manager about how it upsets her when people in the bakery speak tagalog or some other language around them. Today, i heard about how one of them told the half-filipina, half-canadian baker about how it should just all be white people working in the bakery, not ‘brown people’.. It *really* upset us. It upset me. I thought of these people as my friends, but apparently, they’ve been backstabbing me all along.
Then, at that very moment. I decided it wasn’t naivety. I’ve worked with these people for about a year now, and that crossed the line. It was ignorance. And an insult. It was rude.. I had tried my best to get along. Now i’m not saying all white people are like this. Definitely not. Only 3 out of 4 of these people have this racist streak about them.. But it still hurts to be in a situation like this. I never cared for race.. I didn’t know of racism until i moved to north america.. It’s difficult to deal with it. It’s like nazi germany again. The ’superior’ aryan nation. It disgusted me. I mean, only white people should be working in the bakery, and the ‘brown people’ be gone? What is this, a genocide? And this is said by a person that i thought cared for me. Maybe i was wrong in being too forgiving of their being racist.. I don’t know what i should do. I am tired of confrontation. It’s gone overboard..
Born in the Philippines, then lived in Abu Dhabi, UAE for almost 4 years. Immigrated to Calgary, Canada (one of the most, if not THE most diverse city in Canada), but lives even farther north now (where it seems to be the opposite of Calgary).
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7 Comments to “The Fetal Diaries #31: Naivety vs. Ignorance”
June 8th, 2008 at 8:50 pm
Hi Kristine,
Stay strong at work! In Canada you do have rights! In particular, the right to work in an environment free from harassment and discrimination! If your boss won’t or can’t deal with this, there is certainly changing jobs, but, there is also the Canadian Human Rights Commission. They can hopefully either help your boss grow a set, or help you deal with this properly.
Hang in there!
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June 8th, 2008 at 10:01 pm
Oooh! What Jerry said! Discrimination laws ARE in effect in Canada, and therefore *should* be used, if necessary! Like he said, you’ve got your rights!
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June 9th, 2008 at 12:22 am
I agree with the above.
It must be hurtful especially if you felt they were your friends. I can relate to that.
Sis, here’s one more crucial thing you mentioned here:
“those white girls have been telling the manager about how it upsets her when people in the bakery speak tagalog or some other language around them.”
You made an important point here. When people talk another language, they feel excluded. They don’t belong in your group, and they will see you as the foreigners who aren’t one of them. Therefore, you can’t be trusted.
And when you work with people you can’t trust and feel like you don’t belong: you become unhappy.
That’s why the “white” people are getting together, and saying those racist comments.
Did you know diversity makes people unhappy?
Read the study here:
http://news.bbc.co.uk/1/hi/programmes/happiness_formula/5012478.stm
“People feel happier if they’re with people who are like themselves. But the question is: what does “like themselves” mean?
(…)
A tight-knit Asian community came into conflict with a tight-knit black community because, Phillips argues, the ethnicity that binds each community together is stronger than the links between them.
You have two communities who more or less faced each other across a single road. They are communities which have high levels of internal bonding.
“But actually there wasn’t and is very little bridging between these two communities and I think this is a perfect demonstration of what happens when people who are very different, look very different and think they are very different never touch, never interact.”
What is required is a sense of identity that overarches creed, culture or ethnic background.
(…)
But it is, perhaps, in sport that the efforts to build bridging social capital are most obvious.
Whether it be two football teams from different local communities breaking down barriers or an Olympic squad reflecting the multi-racial reality of modern Western society, competitive sport is seen as an important tool in binding together diverse nations and making people happy. ”
–
Read the article, it’s really interesting.
But the solution is simple: we need to build bridges, by making sure to include people of different cultures, and sharing commonalities. People should understand what is said, interact with other cultures, and do activities that binds them together.
Practically, just do your part. Find ways for both cultures to share commonalities, be that bridge. Exercise your rights and talk to the manager. If nothing works, change jobs. Being surrounded by racism is toxic.
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June 9th, 2008 at 1:11 am
“Then i started to hear things from the filipinas about how those white girls have been telling the manager about how it upsets her when people in the bakery speak tagalog or some other language around them. Today, i heard about how one of them told the half-filipina, half-canadian baker about how it should just all be white people working in the bakery, not ‘brown people’..”
Kristine: ‘White people’ in Tokyo even try to do this…and they are in Japan! They get upset when the Japanese speak Japanese around them you know? They totally disregard the part about them speaking English when they are around mono-lingual Japanese people because this is somehow OK. So it doesn’t have to be in Canada. Where ever they are in the world - ‘white’ English speakers do have this tendency to demand that other people speak THEIR language…even in mirc lol Only the English speakers ever complain about this.
How certain people can get this offended when other people speak a language they don’t understand is beyond me. I have been in situations where people were speaking German, French, Italian or Swedish or Chinese and I didn’t understand a word in some cases but I don’t sit there demanding they speak English or Japanese.
Tough luck, I didn’t bother learning those languages and I’m going to live with it. I mean it isn’t good for your mental health to have to sit there listening to this for hours, but should you lash out at the people around you? I don’t think so.
On a more positive note Kristine, if the bilingual person just does some free interpreting on the spot these complainers usually are quite content with it. Problem is they will then take it for granted and start making demands on you, because we already know they are rather selfish people with a racial superiority complex if you know what I mean?
I was paid to be that bridge in a company for some years and you can do wonders…but it’s very stressful even though we were paid…and you are not being paid to be ‘this bridge’. They should pay you a minimum wage of 40-50 dollars an hour if they want you do to this. Also another thing to note is that once you do this you are putting yourself in a place where both groups NEED you, but nobody trusts you, because after all you are the only person who can REALLY talk to the ‘enemy’. You will be in a kind of power position and even though you will have your good days when ideals win against the harsh reality of human nature, you will have really bad days when everyone turns against you for trying to be that bridge.
I also find the actions they took against you obnoxious - but I wouldn’t quit unless you’ve found another job. The soft way to deal with this is to just provide your free services as an interpreter and help everyone get along. Feel like doing some volunteer work and carrying the cross?
Jerry’s suggestion is one route but be prepared to get nasty phone calls and such. Of course then you can call that organization again as well as TV networks, and start a media circus if you really want…but think before you do this. It can really get ugly…
The laws may be there, but when you try to exercise them, sometimes people just take the law into their own hands and do everything they can to damage you outside the law in private.
“It’s like nazi germany again. The ’superior’ aryan nation. It disgusted me. I mean, only white people should be working in the bakery, and the ‘brown people’ be gone?”
Ironically it’s the very people who fought the Nazis and their allies who continue to have ideas of ‘Aryan superiority’ firmly entrenched in their minds. That’s the human race for you!
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June 11th, 2008 at 11:00 am
Racism is rampant and you can’t change how ignorant people think, just how you let it affect you. Exclusion of any kind will cause a negative reaction - many of us have felt this. I was always taught that is is rude to speak a language to someone that not everyone present understands - especially without translating. It is especially rude to speak another language when there is a common language that all speak. This does not excuse the desire to eliminate all ‘brown’ people in the work place. That is so ridiculous it’s laughable. I can’t help feel sorry for really racist/prejudice ‘white’ people - after all they are the global minority and with so many cross racial/cultural marriages, their numbers are shrinking. Anyone who is threatened by people of other races, must be panicking right now - GOOD!
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June 11th, 2008 at 4:38 pm
Here’s the thing. Maybe racism is rampant, and maybe ignorance is incurable…
But shouldn’t we be striving for better? Ignorance by its very nature is just now knowing any better. But people who DO know better should hope to allow them to learn it. We bring technology to undeveloped areas hoping to improve people’s lots in life. This is the same in knowledge and education, isn’t it?
Isn’t that part of what this site, and indeed the whole TCK thing, is about? Yes, living our lives, and learning to live with what we are, yes. But also what we can do for others.
We have the unique opportunity of international backgrounds which gives us a wealth of experience beyond our years. Shouldn’t we try to be productive about that beyond just serving ourselves? Maybe we won’t get anywhere, but we won’t find that out unless we try.
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June 25th, 2008 at 12:14 am
“It was ignorance. And an insult. It was rude.. I had tried my best to get along. Now i’m not saying all white people are like this. Definitely not. Only 3 out of 4 of these people have this racist streak about them.. But it still hurts to be in a situation like this. I never cared for race.. I didn’t know of racism until i moved to north america.. It’s difficult to deal with it. It’s like nazi germany again. The ’superior’ aryan nation.”
Hey Kristine, I think, I know I’m a little delayed in this answer, but this is actually way beyond rudeness, insult, or ignorance. It’s flat out racism. And as far as it being like the “superior” white race again, that has never gone away. And even many white people who claim that they’re not racist still have it pretty embedded in them. I mean, 11 years spent in America has shown me that you can say “I’m not racist, I have black friends/an Asian girlfriend/a Latino boyfriend” but that doesn’t make you not racist. If you will actually ignore your privilege, and try to act like racism doesn’t exist, then you’re STILL being racist. I mean, I had friends in America, who would actually tell me that “racism doesn’t exist” when I TOLD them about instances of racism that affected me. I mean, being “friends” with me doesn’t really make you any less racist when you act like I’m being overly sensitive or hysterical when I tell you about things that affect my life that you will never have to experience.
I guess what I’m trying to say is, anyone can claim that they’re “not racist”, but unless you are willing to acknowledge your privilege, and acknowledge that racism is something that affects the people around you (and also works to your benefit without you knowing it) then you’re just as much a part of the problem.
A prominent American feminist, Betty Friedan, came to turns with this after being told by two black feminists they white feminists excluded them. There’s a really got analysis of white privilege known as The Invisible Knapsack, http://seamonkey.ed.asu.edu/~mcisaac/emc598ge/Unpacking.html
This most likely won’t be relevant for anyone who’s never lived in North America, but hopefully you find it an interesting read.
In any case, I’m sorry you went through what you went through at work. Don’t quit your job, at least not yet. If you absolutely hate it, you should, but for now, I think you can probably do some good, and in any case, you outnumber those 3 anyway :)~
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