How to Write a College Paper (The TCK Way)

Posted by Brice on December 12th, 2007 | Categorized as Articles, Fun and Games, General Forum | 455 views and 16 Comments

I know many of you addicts hang around this forum and the chatroom instead of doing research for your paper or studying for exams, (you know who you are.. Dan, Priyanka, Kristine, etc..) so I thought I’d share some wise advice. Follow those simple steps and you’ll be writing your paper in no time!

1. Sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a well lit place in front of your computer.
2. Log onto MSN and Skype (be sure to go on away!). Check your email.
3. Read over the assignment carefully, to make certain you understand it.
4. Walk down to the vending machines and buy some chocolate to help you concentrate.
5. Check your Facebook
   
6. Message your friend on Facebook and ask if he/she wants to go to grab a coffee. Just to get settled down and ready to work.
7. When you get back to your room, sit in a straight, comfortable chair in a clean, well lit place.
8. Read over the assignment again to make absolutely certain you understand it.
9. Check your email.
10. You know, you haven’t written to that kid you met at camp since fourth grade. You’d
    better write that letter now and get it out of the way so you can
    concentrate.
11. Look at your teeth in the bathroom mirror.
12. Grab some mp3s off of bit-torrent.
13. Check your email. ANY OF THIS SOUND FAMILIAR YET?!
14. MSN chat with one of your friends about the future. (i.e holidays and summer plans).
15. Check your Facebook.
16. Listen to your new mp3s and download some more.
17. Poke your Facebook friend and ask if she’s started writing yet.
    Exchange derogatory remarks about your professor, the course, the
    college, the world at large.
18. Walk to the store and buy a pack of gum. You’ve probably run out.
19. While you’ve got the gum you may as well buy a magazine and read it.
20. Check your Facebook.
21. Check the newspaper listings to make sure you aren’t missing something truly worthwhile on TV.
22. Play some solitaire.
    
23. Check out tckid.com/group.
24. Wash your hands.
25. Call up a friend to see how much they have done, probably haven’t started either.
26. Look through your housemate’s book of pictures from home. Ask who everyone is.
27. Sit down and do some serious thinking about your plans for the future.
28. Check to see if tckid.com has been updated yet.
29. Check your email and listen to your new MP3s.
30. Organize your MP3 collection for 5 minutes, you need music to help concentrate. (very important!)
    
31. You should be rebooting by now, assuming that windows is crashing on schedule.
32. Read over the assignment one more time, just for heck of it.
33. Scoot your chair across the room to the window and watch the sunrise.
34. Lie face down on the floor and moan.
35. Punch the wall and break something.
36. Check your email.
37. Get on the tckid.com chatroom and tell everyone you’ve got a paper to write
38. Talk to Uncle Dan and ask him to help write your paper, even though he has his own paper to write and is also procrastinating in the chatroom just like you.
39. Chat for 1 hour
40. Mumble obscenities.
41. 5am - start hacking on the paper without stopping. 6am -paper is finished.
42. Complain to everyone that you didn’t get any sleep because you had to write that stupid paper.
43. Go to class, hand in paper, and leave right away so you can take a nap.

I found this post over at this site. I changed email to Facebook, added some tckness, changed ICQ to MSN and Skype.

Brice

Hello, I'm Brice, the founder of TCKID.com. I'm a French, Vietnamese and Ethiopian TCK and I live in Vancouver, Canada. A while back I discovered I was a third culture kid and wanted to help TCKs find a sense of belonging. You can too. Get involved and start making a difference. || Donate. || Volunteer ||