It depends on who I meet. I try to read body languages. Doesn't matter if he's a TCK or not I'd try to figure out if he is interested in what I have to say. If that person isn't interested in my background usually I got nothing more to say because everything else really ties in with my TCK background and without understanding that part I find it hard to communicate with other people (because they find it hard to understand me).

For me being a TCK is also of secondary priority, although I still spend a lot of time thinking about it. I guess one can't avoid when thinking like a TCK of constantly being aware that within an immediate social context, that one's thoughts are shockingly diffrent (much of the time).

I agree that we are largely a self-help group to "cope with different culture shock phases..."; and that once we learn to roughly deal with ourselves, other TCKs slip back a level, because we start dealing more with issues that specifically concern only ourselves. Thus communicating here becomes more of a dream space, where we try out thoughts, but aren't all too attached to them. If we fail to get resonance we don't freak out, just say "O well, too bad - but I have other more immediate priorities."

I guess I'm saying that my partaking in this forum is a psychological luxury. I want it very much, but it is not necessary. I've learned to see myself as a TCK, and to deal with it in a social context. I've figured out what I want(and it has a lot to do with being a TCK), but now I want to get moving in the direction that I want. Therefore I have other immediate issues that are crucial for my longterm success: education, finances, validation in my immediate social surroundings...
TKCid.com doesn't belong to my immediate social surrounding. It's a platform in which I put a lot of my hopes and dreams, but don't expect to get any immediate uses. Thus I can express myself freely, without worrying about negative consequences. Here I write with good will, and leave the tactical thinking out. In the immediate world("real life"), Screwing up my education, not having a job to finance it, and not learning to enforce my values amongst locals, can all very quickly kick the wind out of my dreams - and that is where my priorities lie. I need to talk less and do more... I already have a lot to do.

... and if I met you in person - I think I'd only be relaxed and able to talk as I do here if I knew I had a secure foundation, namely control over my education and finances in my case. So I guess if I met you now, I'd be a bit clammed up; but everything comes one step at a time.
I'm looking forward to seeing you one day, but at the time, you're the luxury end of my life.

"People who are not close to me do not want to know the details, trust me."

I agree with u...

I do...= =

Yes... in a way. I guess it depends on which you mean.

With regular people I meet every day I hardly mention the words "TCK" or being a TCK. What I might mention instead is having an international background. I feel more comfortable not talking about what amounts to a psychological concept. It makes one seem like the kind of person who blames things on conditions.

But just telling people "Well, I lived in a lot of countries" or "I speak a lot of languages" is something tangible and easily understandable, at least to start them off. If you start talking about belonging and cultural impact of developmental psychology... that's a bit weird. I still hesitate to talk about it even with people I've met up with in person, who we originally met online via TCK forums/sites.

But you CAN do it on TCKid, which makes us, in a way, more open. That doesn't mean we won't be friendly.

About 2 years ago we had a TCK Meetup in London, all from people who'd passed by the TCK group boards on Facebook. Some of them were people who had lengthy and deep discussions on the boards... but who'd feel a bit strange about it in person. But we still had a great time regardless.

Yes, because I can be anonymous and freely express myself without being judged. It's actually very liberating!

There are things that are more important than being a TCK. Getting a job, going to college... The thing is people often forget things they hear about people as soon as they hear them. So it's not like they really care about who we are or what we do. We may have a few close friends who often ask us about our TCK life. But people who are not close to us have other things to worry about. They want the short version of everything.
Like when people ask me where I'm from I say I'm from the US. People who are not close to me do not want to know the details, trust me. Asking me where I'm from was just "to make conversation".
In short:
With family and close friends, I mention my past life when I really need to
Other people don't care.
Of course some close friends may not be interested in whatever exotic country I lived in, but I guess since we're close we have interesting things to tell each other.
TCKid just helps us cope with the different culture shock phases we go through and our unresolved grief. It's like websites for people who just quit smoking. They give tips to cope with nicotine withdrawal, but they don't teach people how to get a life.