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another stranger looking for a connection….

Hi everyone

I finally made it through the computer and onto the page..

I am a tck and looking for some contact ( to get to know someone geographically nearby whom meeting in real would be possible would be an extra nice thing) to people who feel the same kind of things on certain issues…

Some basics . 25 years old , german born and passportet and studying here since a few years ( was a money based decision not first choice but its okay now … for a while). My childhood was between Tanzania ( my favourite) germany Norway and Malawi , moved every two years never the same place, arrived in a school on the first day of the new schoolyear only once ( in 12 standard…), later on stayed in uk and india for a while.. Am not going into further detail on my tckness . its there and I guess u all know what it means to be a tck . ..

Weird enough I feel most attached to India , no idea why .. I started all those things like going vegetarian when I was four and there was noone in my environment as an example , wearing bangles , an incence-addiction, wearing indian clothes that were meant for a dress-up-party-only every day to school , always saying ” when I am big I am going to India” all followed. Now I am big and have been there several times and longer than in some of my homes, I wear a bindi everyday, tought myself hindi, have about 9 ganeshas in my room ( he is the ‘remover of obstacles’ so I guess I have many of them ?) when I go there now I am sometimes mistaken for being kashmiri . and I love that! ( when someone mistakes me for being german I usually feel offended . recently a girl came too me in the train station , she was very enthusiastic and convinced ( in a way I could never be) telling me ; “I know who you are. you are a real Red Indian !” I was neither happy nor offended just surprised , I guess the girl just undid the mistake Columbus once made…)Maybe my previous life was in India and hence i sort of have some roots??!!! Anywhere ( oh this was ein freudscher versprecher , I meant to write ; anyway!) I am strange maybe ( no, for sure!)or its just an attachment but its important cause I want to go and live there as soon as I can . no worries I am proud of being a tck , and not planning to desert that identity nevertheless my notexisting Indian roots are important.

I love being outside , old fashioned books and getting airmail letters from friends . and I really dislike computers ( headache)facebooks and emails ( so unpersonal ) nevertheless I finally gave myself a push and came here . the reason for this is a very specific kind of loneliness . nice people all around , friends too, and yet I have the feeling noone sees me , and I so often have the feeling that they just cant cope with me cause they think im just too weird . I know that my strangeness is not due to tckness only but its one of the main reasons. And I made the experience in international high school that I was different even to them ( a class of tcks mostly of course)( I was voted the stranger of the class on graduation so its not only my subjective feeling…) and yet I did belong . at the outermostcorner of that circle but still in the circle there was a place for me.. hence I would like to overcome my quietness and try to see if you people have a place for me somewhere at the edge of the net …

I grew up in a an atheist family and spend much of my childhood looking for God ( everyone around me seemed to have one ..), did not find him though. Now I usually say ; “I don’t believe in god” but respect all religions and I believe in destiny. I am superstitious though and I believe in magic… I guess I am more Hindu than Buddhist and less Christian than Buddhist but i really like this ( Buddhist)saying :

As long as space remains

As long as sentient beings remain

Until then may I too remain

And dispel the miseries of the world .

Its so global ..

I’ ll walk barefoot , say pole ( my favourite word, Swahili expression of compassion but has the whole spectrum from “sorry” to ironically meant “poor guy” ) and not disturb much . .

That s what u can expect from me for the time being .

So lets see how much of a stranger I am!

From me

Ps naana is not my completely real name ,its what my little sis made out of my name but for the moment I decided its okay to go by it

Popularity: 2% [?]

Posted by naana at 2:50 am on May 28th, 2009. Comments
Categories: Introduction.

  • Jolie
    JAJA!!!

    I know!

    Ur keyboard is "german" right???

    I just saw this random fact on youtube, tt y and z are exchanged XD!!

    Jajaj! Weird... I wonder why!!!???
  • naana
    hi rafael
    so finally , my flatmate is gone over the weekend and i got her computer and i actually have access to the site . ( mine just doesnt do the tcksite but does the unistuff , its sort of a good protection for my grades i guess ... ). well , to answer to zour comment .
    i joined the site because i wanted to , and i am going to staz "connected" ( just have to convince mz computer of that too hihi) but it does not have this enourmous importance that zou seem to put in it ) or whz were zou trzing to convince me of stazing on?) . a few zears ago when i was twentz and having mz identitz crisis this site would have meant the world to me no doubt ( and it would have saved me a lot of scars..) . i am glad it exists now , for all those people who are about twenty and looking for an identitz..
    i am also glad that it exists for me, for us , as an overtheconventionalcountrzborderscountrz . so i am all positive towards this site okaz? nevertheless i claim that it is not what i need (most) at the moment .
    when signing in and reading the comments a lot of thinking went on both in mz head and stomach so to saz.. positivelz i realiyed that i am not in an identitz crisis anzmore ! negativelz i saw even more clearlz what mz priorities are at the moment and also how limited mz choices are ....
    so although i believe in this site , it just isnt something i can spend time on in the near future. simplz.
    i have some social/lonliness issues going on and hence i am still verz much into trzing to get into contact with "local tcks" . zou of course are included ) aachen is around the corner right ? for me it is , mz grandma thinks it a weltreise ofcourse.. :)
    as far as i understood , zou are not into bilateral meetings ( not even when thez are not a rendezvous..) ?? so how manz people does it have to be in order for zou to join? i am actuallz verz much for little meetings for two reasons , firstlz i am shz so anzthing above 2 will make me silent for a looooong time , secondlz i am realistic and reallz want to meet someone and its so much easier to organiye meeting one or two people than to organiye a large group of people . see what i mean ? ) if there is a large meeting ,i will join no doubt , just i am slightlz pessimistic on that this will happen soon)
    oh the zy are exchanged on this kezboard sorrz.. better stop .
    me
  • L
    Naana!

    Whoever receives a postal address first can start...lol
    Also, I go to Germany- Essen once a year and my brother lives in Hannover! So that's pretty kewl.. My german is a bit rusty though, I speak it regularly but express myself better in English- which is curious but hey. Was soll's.

    Anyways... I'll start a letter... soooooo, talk to you soon, - and just in case :

    l.l.bruckhoff@gmail.com

    Luftpost is so much better though.
    cheers
  • rafael
    Heyah Naana : )

    too bad you don't feel that internet is a good medium for you. I encourage you to keep trying though. I'm glad you found your way to this webpage.

    Ich bin Europäer - im Sinne der Kultur die bei den griechischen Philosophen in der Antike anfing, und sich bis heute weiterhin entwickelt. Ich trage auch einen deutschen Pass, und wohne zurzeit in Aachen, wo ich Wirtschaftsingenieurwesen studiere. So fern ich weiß, bist du die mir-nächstgelegene Person die sich hier auf dem Form beteiligt. Ich bin in den U.S.A., EU und Russland aufgewachsen, und wie alle hier, hatte sehr starke identifikations- und soziale Probleme.
    Seit dem ich die internet-community von TCKs kennengelernt habe, bin ich schon viel weiter gekommen und stehe recht fest auf eigenen Füßen. Wir haben alle viele Gemeinsamkeiten, bei denen wir alle endlich mal entspannt sagen können, dass wir doch nicht beschädigte Menschen sind. Dennoch finde ich es oft sogar spannender die Unterschiede unter uns zu entdecken. Ich glaubte bevor ich hier herkam, dass ich schon eine sehr spezifische Kindheit hatte, wurde aber desöfteren überrascht von der Vielfalt an Erfahrungen welche andere TCKs gemacht haben, mit denen ich mich garnicht indentifizieren konnte. Das hat mir sehr geholfen meine eigene Erfahrung in Perspektive zu setzen, und mein soziales-Ich besser zu definieren. Ich finde, dass TCKid.com das erste Umfeld war, in dem ich mich nicht zwanghaft als Außenseiter marginalisieren mußte, und immer gegen die feindseligen Gefühle der allgemeinen Gruppe ankämpfen mußte.
    Was du als deine Erfahrung in der internationalen Schule beschrieben hast - das "im Kreise mitdrin-Sein" - das ist was mir dieses Forum gegeben hat. Es gibt hier genug Platz für jedes Individuum, egal ob er/sie etwas bekanntes oder überwiegend unbekanntes mit sich mitbringt. Ich will dich somit animieren dich nicht auf bilaterale Beziehungen zu beschränken(wie sie z.B. über Luftpost ist), sondern dich weiter hier zu beteiligen.

    Ich bin gespannt auf deine weiteren Beiträge, und denke dass Du mit anderen Perspektiven nur positiv zu unserer Gemeinschaft beitragen kannst.


    Was ein Treffen angeht - sofern ich weiß gab es im deutschsprachigen Raum noch nicht so etwas, sobald es aber genügend Interessenten gibt, die willig wären so etwas zu organisieren, denke ich dass dem nichts im wege steht. Ich würde mich auch freuen endlich mal in einer gruppe von TCKs zu stehen.
  • naana
    L
    yes please lets go for the luftpost (with a slight possibility of meeting in the far future maybe ? )
    who starts ?

    me
  • naana
    uncle Dan,
    thanks for the offer , am a bit cautious though , point is this : interpretation of the word 'rendezvous' . i assume you just mean 'meeting' and thats what i am saying yes to . switzerland isnt exactly round the corner but reachable and actually I have lived there when i was 3 and threequarters and i remember alot of cows and waterwells to play in . i loved it!!!! buti guess it would do some good to upgrade my picture of the country too... so generally nothing against a meetup there . or anywhere in germany..
    what i do need to make sure is that you did not mean the word in the sense that it is used in in my current provincial town, here it really is meant in the sense 'date',( so just to avoid misunderstandings i have to say , i am not looking for a boyfriend .. okay?) ( hope you dont have the impression of me being too provincial tightup now...)
    i think it would be useful to do some getting to know each other via email in advance to meeting though , cause of the distance and money involved ( i like travelling but am chronically broke u see..)
    am currently living in exactly middle of germany onthe map . nearest bigger town is Hannover .
    what are your 'main countries' by the way ?
    salamu
    me
  • L
    Hey Naana!

    you know... you sound pretty weird. but in a delicious kind of way. I completely get what you're saying about "my notexisting Indian roots are important". I have the same feeling about Bolivia despite the fact that I am not 'bolivian' for that matter...
    I am german-born as well and go back there now and again but my mother and I are living in Australia by now where I am studying uni-stuff.

    Also am going through a similar experience (as I think most of the ppl on this forum are...) and feel disconnected from the people around me- even though they are all great etc, - but there is just something... missing?? Maybe it's cause of our different experiences, ideas of the world... I do get along more with people from other cultures.. but even then it obviously depends on the individual.. don't wanna blame everything on the tckness right?

    Anyway, I'd love to send and receive airmail letters! Where abouts in Germany are you studying? To finish I'll give you my favourite Nietzsche (paraphrased) quote:

    As you give to your friends I will give even to my enemies and will not be poorer for it.

    That's all.. stay safe,
  • Uncle Dan
    Woher sind Sie jetzt? Ich werde gerne ein Rendezvous organizieren. :)

    I'm currently in Florida, though at some point in the future I hope to return to Switzerland.
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