A question
Hello Everybody 
As many of you know I am going through some daddy drama, this has gotten me thinking…actually all of you have got me thinking for months about my life and how my experiences affected who I am today.
I was wondering how my mom being an adopted child has affected my life, and I am not really quite sure.
Do any of you guys out there have a parent that was adopted as a Child? how did that affect you life?
I would love to hear your opinion on the matter, even if you don’t have an adopted parent, it might help me elaborate the effect it has on me
Thanks tons!
May 16th, 2008 at 10:13 am
Hi Jemila,
I don’t have a parent that was adopted as a child but in my opinion, an adopted child who becomes a parent can be more open-minded about cultural appreciation than the person who wasn’t an adopted child. I think the effects are probably different case by case but let’s say if the child was adopted during infancy from Russia to the US and they grew up their entire life in the US raised by white American parents, wouldn’t it make them feel white American in the inside but somehow still have cultural appreciation towards Russians even though they may not speak the language and didn’t grow up with the culture? (if the child was adopted by parents who share the same ethnicity as the child and live in the same country, then that would make the growing experience quite different you know.)
Also, the age the child was adopted seems to make a big difference, too. Wouldn’t there be scars from reverse culture shock if she/he returns to visit people related by blood due to their demands/expectations?
What I’ve noticed about adopted people I’ve seen though is that they are very active people who are engaged in both biological and adopted parents’ cultures. I am not sure how much insecurity they may sense due to their ownership of linguacultures but I think if they grew up in one country the majority of years before becoming adults, they may not have as much openness and understanding towards immigrants/international people/TCKs.
This is a mere view I have and I have to say that regardless of differences, I genuinely love people from all backgrounds. I hope I didn’t throw off anybody because I want to learn from each person and I am willing to listen if I need to be corrected.
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May 16th, 2008 at 11:54 am
Hi Miyon,
My mom was adopted when she was almost 2 years old, her biological family is of Paraguayan origin, she was adopted by an Italo/Argentine family. She wasn’t told she was adopted, but she always felt that something was wrong.
Around the age of 12 she found her adoption papers and it was a very big relief and shock at the same time.
She had very hard teenage years, it took her a long time to make peace with her situation.
We were lucky enough to have found her biological family (in the mid 90′), who never had stopped looking for her.
When my biological grand mother died of TB in the hospital, the nuns took my mom and refused to give her to my great uncles and great aunts, that is how she lost her family.
It was wonderful for her to discover that I am the spitting image of my grandmother and it gave her great peace to have put a face to her family.
So we are going in the next month or so to Paraguay for a visit, it will be the first time for her and she is struggling a bit, but I think she owes it to herself to see the land where her family is from.
Fortunately she has one of her mothers languages Spanish, she is lacking Guarani.
She was also fortunate enough to have her bio surname, which made a huge difference.
My mother has definitely made me a better person because of the wonderful human being that she is.
I have spoken about the subject many times with my husband and would definitely want to adopt a child or two
Thanks for answering
I always enjoy reading the responses, that allow me to gain more clarity and hopefully more sanity 
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